Then I tried to read some magazines, but again, I just couldn’t.  It wasn’t so much that they mentioned what the people were eating.  It was all the magazine covers.  Each one had a smiling face, and every time it was a woman on the cover, she was showing her cleavage.  I wondered if they had a choice or not if they wanted to be successful.  I just couldn’t get that thought out of my mind.

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I was very nervous, especially because in the show, Rocky has to touch Janet all over her body, and Sam was playing Janet.  Patrick kept making jokes that I would get an “erection.”  I really hoped this wouldn’t happen.

And all the books you’ve read have been read by other people.  And all the songs you’ve loved have been heard by other people.  And that girl that’s pretty to you is pretty to other people.  And you know that if you looked at these facts when you were happy, you would feel great because you are describing “unity.”

I don’t know if you’ve ever felt like that.  That you wanted to sleep for a thousand years.  or just not exist.  Or just not be aware that you do exist.

“Is it your aunt Helen?”

It was the way she said it that started me feeling.

“Please, don’t do this to yourself, Charlie.”

But I did it to myself.  Like I do every year on my birthday.

“I’m sorry.”

After that, I couldn’t believe that Sam actually got me a present because I honestly thought that the “I love you” was it.

I decided then that when I met someone I thought was as beautiful as the song, I should give it to that person.  And I didn’t mean beautiful on the outside.  I meant beautiful in all ways.

I am really in love with Sam, and it hurts very much.

I want Sam to stop liking Craig.

Now, I guess maybe you think that’s because I’m jealous of him.  I’m not.  Honest.  It’s just that Craig doesn’t really listen to her when she talks.  I don’t mean that he’s a bad guy because he’s not.  It’s just that he always looks so distracted.

It’s like he would take a photograph of Sam, and the photograph would be beautiful.  And he would think that the reason the photograph was beautiful was because of how he took it.  If I took it, I would know that the only reason it’s beautiful is because it’s Sam.

To tell you the truth, I love Sam.  it’s not a movie kind of love, either.  I just look at her sometimes, and I think she is the prettiest and nicest person in the whole world.